Me and Erik

Me and Erik

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Eggs are out! :)

So we went in to the clinic at 7:45 to have my eggs removed. Of course upon arrival I got to get in the cute outfit of a gown, feet covers and the stylish hair net. Then they did the usual, blood pressure, temperature, and an IV to give me fluids. Then they gave me the first round of sedation and expected me to walk to the room where the procedure would be done. That was probably entertaining...I couldn't walk straight. ha After I was in the room they gave me another round of sedation and they got started. I can sort of remember a little bit of a pinching feeling throughout the procedure but not much else.
After I got back to the recovery room (which I cannot remember at all), I noticed I was in a bit of pain. So she gave me some pain meds in my IV and sent Erik to Walgreens to pick up some more pain meds. I felt ok while laying down but the minute I had to get up to get dressed it hurt quite a bit. Luckily, the pain meds kicked in on the way home.
Good news is they got 30 eggs and I think 25 they were going to try to fertilize. The other 5 weren't ready. They will call tomorrow to let us know how many were fertilized and I will go in on Tuesday for them to be put back in. So far this is good news.
Bad news, I start the progesterone shots tomorrow which go in my hip/butt and they are the long needles. I'm very very scared. They have to be given the same time everyday so with Erik's work schedule we need to come up with a plan.
We are near the end and I need your prayers more then ever. I know this has all gone as smooth as it can because of your prayers. I really feel like I am not alone and like I've said before it feels like I don't have to carry this load alone. You will never know how much I am thankful.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

God is good (quick update)

So a quick update. I went in to get labs done today to check my levels. I was praying that they would go down a little bit to show progress. I was fully expecting to do another round of the acetate injection to keep lowering my levels.
I think they knew I was really anxious about it so I got a call an hour and a half after my lab draw this morning letting me know my numbers were good and we could go ahead and trigger tonight. I know that was all God. I prayed in my room for an hour yesterday and I know more people were too. I am so thankful to have a God who answers prayer.
So we will do 2 trigger injections at 9:00 tonight and I will stop all other drugs except baby aspirin. Then tomorrow start the antibiotics again and then go in Thursday morning to retrieve my eggs.
Please continue to pray everything goes well and we get alot of eggs fertilized on Thursday. Good news is that I have alot of follicles (around 20 in just one ovary). I again appreciate all the prayers.

Monday, September 27, 2010

And the Rollercoaster Starts

As I posted before, on Friday had blood work and an ultrasound and my estradiol levels were 2,000, which isn't bad yet but a little higher then they wanted so we cut out Follistim all together. I also had to go in for blood work and an ultrasound on Sunday and again today. Well my eggs are large enough to be taken out but my estradiol levels are now at 9,000 putting me at huge risk for OHSS. The nurse called and said to decrease my meds and then to take Ganirlex Acetate Injection instead of the Lupron. I guess this is to drastically decrease my estradiol levels while keeping me from ovluating. The nurse seemed to think that after a day or two of this injection my numbers will come down enough for us to then schedule egg retrieval.
I heard this process is full of highs and lows and until now things have been going well so I guess this is when the rollercoaster ride starts. I am anxious and just pray that this injection works and my numbers will go low enough to retrieve my eggs.
Please keep us in your prayers. Of course my mind goes to worst case scenario thinking it will be cancelled if my numbers don't get low enough. I need to keep faith in God.

Friday, September 24, 2010

Prayer Request

Just a quick prayer request because I am feeling anxious although I know it will be fine. My labs (E2) came back at 2,000 which is fine but they do not want them to go above 5,000 so they took me off my Follistim starting tomorrow morning. I also will go back in Sunday for more lab work and another ultrasound. Everything else is looking perfect. They said if it gets too high they will stop all medication and "coast" till my levels get below 5,000. The doctor said he only had to cancel once and that was because the girl was in the hospital with bad OHSS (over hyperstimulation) . I only should have a few more days before I have to do the Trigger shot and they take my eggs. So I don't have much longer. So hopefully being off the Follistim will help my levels to stay within range.
So just pray that the levels don't get too high. Pray hard!! Thanks so much!

Monday, September 20, 2010

Getting closer

This won't be a long post just wanted to quickly update where I am at in the process. I am still taking my Lupron injection every evening. I've been doing that for for about 2 weeks now and I am a pro at injecting myself. :) I also finished my antibiotics a couple of weeks ago. It was a relief to be done with those. I was so sick. As soon as I finished those I felt great and back to normal.
This morning I started my Follistim injection. I was originally supposed to do 150 IU a day but during last visit to the doctor they said everything looked great and I already had a good amount of egg sacs on my ovaries so they lowered my Follistim to 75 IU so that I don't overstimulate. I have to to it around the same time every morning. I work at 6:30am on Thurs and Fri and so I decided I would do the shot around 7:00 am that way on Thurs morning I would just do it an hour earlier. This morning I didn't have to work so I set my alarm to give myself the shot and go back to bed. That's always a good way to wake up..ha!
Tonight I will continue with the Lupron and add the Repronex injection. This will make 3 injections a day. They really aren't bad though.
This week I have an ultrasound and labs on Wednesday and Friday. Then next week if all looks good they will take the eggs from me and fertilize them then they will be put back in 5 days later. We are getting so close and I can't wait!
Please keep praying. Pray hard!! We are nearing the end of all of this and I am getting a little more anxious. Thanks again for all of your prayers they are so appreciated.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Alot on my mind this week

I've been thinking about the purpose of my blog and realize I haven't been doing what I wanted to do. I guess the main purpose was to keep family and friends updated on the process so they would know better how to pray but also to maybe help others who may be going through a similar struggle. I have realized that, yes, I've been giving all the facts but am leaving out alot of the emotional aspect of it. I struggle with this all the time. I hate to be the one who's sad or depressed or upset. My friends can attest to this. I feel like majority of my life I am the "strong" one or the "peacemaker". I am the one who listens and helps people with their problems so much so that my friends have dubbed me "Dr. Phil" or "Mom". So apart of me feels like if I breakdown who will hold us all up? Stupid, I know...I am not so awesome that everyone depends on me for their world to go round but for some reason I have a hard time opening up in a vulnerable way. I would rather feel any other emotion then sadness. I just hate to be sad and try to avoid thinking or feeling sadness. I say all this because I want anyone reading this who is going through this or have a friend/family who is going through this to know everything involved in this process.
I know everyone is different but I have noticed myself disconnecting with everyone and everything. I feel like if I could just hibernate till this is all over that would be great. It's the feels like you can't take a complete deep breath until it's over. I just really want this to work.
Now don't get me wrong. I am not complaining. I just want to be honest on how I've been feeling so people can know better how to pray for us and also to help others. I will say this, I am thankful for the trials in my life. Now obviously if I had a choice I wouldn't choose this for me or anyone but unfortunately life isn't perfect. I really hate the saying "Why do bad things happen to good people?" Define good. We are all sinners we are not perfect and yes sin has entered the world and to think we deserve this perfect life and God must not love us if we have to deal with this is crazy to me. I believe that there might be many reasons for trials but I believe God allows them to make us stronger or to draw us closer to Him. James 1:2-4, "My brethern count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have it's perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing." This is exactly what I am going through I'm going through a trial that is teaching me patience.
I also tell Erik all the time that I am thankful for the trials God has put in our lives because I couldn't imagine going through some of the things that others have to go through. I know that no one's life is perfect and there will always be trials. I have had and do have a great life. I had a near perfect childhood. I got to be a kid! I had great parents who loved us and were involved in every aspect of our lives. We never went without or struggled for anything at least not that I was aware of. We lived in a happy home where we barely heard our parents fight and if they did there was never screaming and yelling let alone violence. I finished highschool and college without anything much going wrong (no deaths, no illnesses ...) I got married to my highschool sweetheart who has spoiled me from day one and I don't deserve him. We both have steady jobs and a nice house and yes money is tight but we don't struggle to pay our bills or to put food on the table (or in my case to get food through a drive up window) ha. I have sisters who are my best friends, a brother I adore, and parents who I respect. So if this is the thing I go through I am so thankful!! I have an uncle struggling with cancer, friends of friends who lost their 4 months old to SIDS, I have a friend who's dad has incurable brain cancer. I can't even begin to imagine going through any of that and I thank God for my trials!!
I know that God wants us happy, even more then my family wants me happy God wants that much more for me. So I know He has a plan. I am thankful He has allowed the means for us to go through with IVF and I am hopeful this will all work. I know we will be blessed and I am so excited.
I'm sorry if this sounds all over the place. In all fairness I did warn you the very first blog that I am not good at writing. I just wanted to let you know some of my thoughts I've been having this week. Again, keep us in your prayers, and also if you could pray for the others I mentioned in this blog that are also going through trials.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

And we begin...

Vacation was great! It was hot every single day and didn't rain once. I love the heat! We layed by the pool every day all day, except one day we did go to Disney World. Disney World was fun and luckily we didn't wait in line more then 10 minutes for anything, in fact, most rides we just walked right on. It was nice to be with my sister for a whole week, although we talk for hours everyday, we hadn't seen each other since Christmas.

Well we are on our way in this IVF process. Sunday both Erik and I started our antibiotics twice a day. I take two antibiotics and he takes one. One of the side effects of the antibiotics is nausea and let me tell you I was nauseated all last night and this morning.

Last night I started the Lupron shot. I was sort of anxious about it for the last few days and more so yesterday morning but not too bad at all. But the minute I uncapped the needle I kind of freaked out more then I thought I would. I wasn't so worried about the pain but more like sticking the needle into my skin. My friend, Joy was over (Erik was working) and we probably looked hilarious. I was holding the needle saying, "I can't do this, I can't do this!" and she was yelling "Do it!! Just do it!!" This went on for at least 5 minutes. Our sliding door was open and our neighbors were probably like what in the world is going on in there. ha ha I finally just pushed the needle into my stomach and honestly I didn't feel a thing. Like Sarah B. told me it wasn't bad at all. It was more the anxiety of getting the first one over with. Tonight should be smooth sailing.....hopefully.

Again the only side effects I am feeling at this point is a little nausea and lack of appetite. For those who know me know I am terrible with nausea but luckily it hasn't been too bad.

I am just looking forward to all of this being over. It should go by pretty fast. Just 4 more weeks and it will all be over....well...hopefully not ALL be over but the medications and constant ultrasounds and lab work.

Thanks for your continued prayers. I can't express enough how thankful I am that I have many people praying, it feels like it takes some of the weight off my shoulders.